Prostitutes, Reverse Cowgirl, Pepper Spray and other Ridiculous Notions

I wasn't sure how to spell "Guwahati"..So, of course i Googled it. And Surprise! Surprise! The first few result pages had nothing to offer, except news reports about the recent heinous incident, or blogs condemning the same. What happened in  Guwahati was terrible to say the least; it was also incredibly frightening for so many of us who sat reading the reports and had the common thought, "That could've been me." 

Of course that could've been us! In fact, how many times have you had a narrow escape from a similar situation? I've lost count of mine.

Terrible, terrible, terrible! BUT....here's the great news! I'm confident that JUSTICE will be done. The identified culprits will Definitely be punished. They have to, right? The media is condemning it enough, we are sharing the images of the culprits on Facebook enough, and we are definitely blogging about it enough. So, soon, this initial wave of outrage will be replaced by a subtle satisfaction that AT LEAST justice was done. 

Bull shit.

So what is the Difference between Us- the distant Facebook-twitter-blogger supporters for a girl we know little about today, and knew nothing about a few days back, And those Journalists who were at the scene of the crime recording away and doing NOT ENOUGH to help? Well, the camera people can give their feeble justifications and the spine-less on-lookers can stay anonymous at best. The Difference between us and them is that WE weren't  at the right place at the right time to be of any help. The best alibi on the planet!

So then, the question is- if YOU WERE there, what would you do? Would you try and rescue the girl? How hard would you try? Would you take on the mob, Or, would you hold onto your clothes and stay invisible, when you know that if you risk action, you risk sharing the victims fate?

Let's be honest here. REACTING as we do Now, solves nothing. A couple of months or years down the line, this incident will be a distant memory and this victim will be a Statistic. Until of-course ANOTHER incident happens. Then we will dig up this gruesome Guwahati grave and create a new more morbid statistic. But next time it could be you; it could be me. 

Some may disagree, but NO, all men are not the same. Not all of them look at women as Objects. Not all of them believe that women have rights and power ONLY as long as the men approve. The problem is the millions of others. "Women empowerment". What a concept! Oprah Winfrey, Sonia Gandhi, Aung San Suu Kyi, the top women in the business and corporate world- all are inspiring examples of powerful women, WOMEN ON TOP. And yet, when they hear "Woman on Top" many of those million think of nothing more than the Reverse Cowgirl.

A random thought i had just now....

We all feel for the victim. But what about the wives, mothers, sisters and maybe daughters of the perpetrators? Are they not suffering as well? We may focus on the 10 odd identified men in this case, but by doing so, no one is solving any problem. No-one is even addressing it! Because the problem seems too huge to solve! It's a Moral disease. Why wait for the appendix to reach the point of explosion? Remove the damn thing when it starts getting infected! I am NOT suggesting any form of Gendercide against men. What i'm begging for, is a solution that actually SOLVES something.

So what is This solution? Well first and foremost! Girls shouldn't walk around alone at night. They shouldn't go to bars (Unless they want to risk being called PROSTITUTES by top Cops), they should dress appropriately, they should keep friends and family informed about their whereabouts 24/7, they should maintain a low-profile (meaning- timidly ignore any obscenity anyone may hurl their way) and worst come to worse- women should carry pepper spray. 

ARE YOU KIDDING ME!

Each of the above solutions imply that the WOMAN is responsible for her fate. She asked for trouble by being at a pub or by dressing "Provocatively". Even Pepper-spray is like giving a man a PENCIL to fend off a pack of wolves- you knows after a couple of jabs, that pencil will snap. 

Some say, this is the Age of the Aquarius, the age when women no longer submit to the will of men; Where women will be self-sufficient, and Where women really shine at the fore-front. I've always drawn motivation and consolation from the fact that the time for women all over the world has just begun. But recently i heard that the age of the Aquarius isn't due till sometime 2150A.D. Given the state of affairs, i'd say that's a reasonable estimate.

Truth be told, i don't know what the solution is. All i know for sure is, that we are not part of the Solution, then we definitely are part of the Problem.

       So that's it i guess! The perpetrators have had their fun in their attempt to "Outrage the Modesty" of a     girl who spoke up for herself. (How dare she!). 

       Since we are talking about it so much, there's a very high probability that "Justice" will be done. 

So that it that! Be Troubled little today and not at all tomorrow. Have a good evening..Until next time...and the time after that. Unless of course, you have a solution? And if you do, please put us women out of our misery and tell us already!

Following suit

What a way to waste a Saturday! At one point it struck me that i had been sitting at the same spot in front of laptop staring at Grooveshark for well over 4 hours! And this realization, by the way, was the highlight of my day! Because hereon, everything changed! No sir! It was no longer about wiling away time. I now had a purpose, a challenge. The challenge now being, "Lets see just how long can i keep sitting here"!! i say this with some pride,its been well over 6 hours now!
At 23, i'm too young to die! but ironically, too old to get out and go crazy on a Saturday- (basically be alive)???
Well it's not so much about the single dead Saturday in the long list of dead Saturdays. So at 23, you know that by now you NEED to know what you should be doing with your life. And once you know what you wanna do with your life,you can enjoy those Saturdays that you get for yourself! So most of us, well, we take the easy way out.
Follow Suit!
The world pursues the stellar academic record, you do the same! Those around you party like rockstars, you do the same! Your buddies get the safe job with the comfortable salary, you do the same! Work sucks, your friends take on the MBA entrance challenge, you do the same!
Well maybe i'm mistaken. Maybe each and everything that you did in your life was fully and completely your own decision, without a trace of external influence. Congratulations to you for that!  For those of us less fortunate, somewhere along the way, while doing those things that we must do, we get massacred!
I realized of late, that probably i'm NOT following my dream! Perhaps, ah-oh! i might be one of the many followers who Thinks he/she is the leader! But, hey! First step on the road to recovery is Acceptance. You must embrace your folly and only then the healing can start.Or at-least so i've been told, and i follow without questioning.
The next step towards realizing your true purpose in life is to "FOLLOW YOUR DREAM!" Excellent! Now all that i have to do, is some more following!
The wise world of the internet, the giver of free advice when you are bored enough to look for it, will give you plenty of reasons why you absolutely Must follow your dream. They tell you inspiring tales about people who left their cozy little lives behind to pursue the true calling. Some even tell you how you should go about following your dream.Whatever advice you need, its there for the taking!
But but but!  how does one know what their dream is!! i like to write, that must be my dream! But i like to paint too! now what! The list of things one enjoys is endless! How does one distinguish among these and determine what their dream is!!! Trivial it may seem, but a lot is at stake here! A jaded soul willing to give up his/her steady income for the pursuit of his/her dream! what if you accidently pick the nightmare instead of the dream! So much pressure!
All this dream talk has made me need a nap. I get it now though. I'll stick the plan. The popularly accepted plan. Follow Suit and save yourself the headache. Sure, someday this will most definitely come back and bite me in the a**.I might be old and grey and living with regret. Or maybe in the years leading up to it, i have a dream that will change the game!Meanwhile,
Follow the Plan! Follow the plan religiously! And pray like mad, that i find my dream.

same shit different year

It's the 30th of December and while a bunch of you anxiously await the eventful night that tomorrow promises, and another lot humbly declares that they are looking forward to the quiet night at home with friends or loved ones, there are probably a couple of you out there who on this "last but one" day of the year, look not forward, but glance backwards at the year that just rushed by. It's not a conscious decision but invariably every year on this day i reflect on the unaccomplished resolutions, the unconquered challenges and  the countless wasted moments and opportunities.

This year ain't too different, except that now my patience is wearing thin!  Usually after realizing how inept i am at honoring my resolutions, i resort to the good old chicken soup for the defeated and depressed soul- the endless ocean of blogs, articles and motivational matter on the net.

Year in and year out my problem remains the same. I suck at keeping my resolutions! Most of them barely see the light of an April day.

Each year i manage to find a different remedy for this same old problem of mine.

There is the 7 fold path to change your life in 7 days!  Easy! Exciting! Brief! Bullshit.

Then there are the countless experiences of so many others from which there is just so much to be learnt. Inspiring. But to be very honest, if i couldn't learn from my own experience in the last however many years of mine, i'm tempted to believe i'm resistant to Experience Therapy!

Last year, "Patience" was the key to flipping my life around, this year its "Passion".

But of course, no matter how different, there is this common string of "Keywords", if i may so call them, that binds all this food for the bored soul together. "Simplify","Principles","Goals","Change". The list goes on.

Pointless analysis, all of the above is. 

But just a thought; if there are oh so many blogs, articles and the like out there that take on this trivial non issue, i'm guessing i'm not the only hopeless one.

So for the many others who find themselves defeated by their resolutions, i TOO have some suggestions to make. Well just one to be honest!

STOP MAKING THEM! 

If something is worth doing, you shouldn't have to wait for a new year to get the ball rolling! Just get on it already. No resolutions, no time wasted on the self help that doesn't help, and no frustration! 

So this year my resolution is to Suck it up! Get over the resolution obsession and RESOLVE to make better plans for the 30th of all decembers that are yet to come.